But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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