if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
