I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
