It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
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