Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize