Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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