just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
you win again, gameday.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
