you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
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