yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
