What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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