You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
These tits shall not be calmed
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
