Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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