Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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