Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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