Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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