We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
