So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Is it penis luge time yet?
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
