i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
what day is it and did you see me today?
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
