i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
