I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
