Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
