Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
