I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I need to stop coming to work sober
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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