the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Randomize
