All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
