So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
True strength comes from lack of pants
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Randomize
