No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
We are two peas in an std pod
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
