Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
