There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
