I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
