i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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