if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Randomize
