fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
The feeling are messing with the penis
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
