her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize
