so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I could fuck to npr.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
