you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
