Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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