I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
