Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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