We named our party play list daddy issues
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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