She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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