I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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