who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Randomize
