Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
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