How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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