Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize
