is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
