Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
