she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
i wish my penis had a tongue
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
