He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
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